I’m writing about this book because I can’t get it out of my head since I read it a couple of weeks ago, but this isn’t a review. Nurse, Nanny …Bride! has one of the most ridiculous backstories I’ve ever read. It’s a Harlequin Medical Romance set in New Zealand. The hero is E.R. consultant Dr. Andrew Barrett, while the heroine is Emergency Nurse Alice Palmer.
Alice shows up for work one day and Andrew is the newest doctor in the department. He is as shocked to see her as she is to see him, and suddenly both are in dazes thinking about what a crappy coincidence this is. They used to work together in London, and had a pretty friendly relationship. Andrew was engaged Melissa, who also worked at the hospital, and Alice was friends with both. Here’s where the backstory gets weird.
Someone started stealing drugs during Alice’s shifts, and an ampule of morphine was found in Alice’s pocket, along with empty ones in her locker. She was allowed to quit rather than be prosecuted. Alice used her savings up while waiting to be cleared, eventually having her house repossessed by the bank and moving back to New Zealand where she got another job. Now Andrew shows up, and while working on a patient, he assily asks her to fetch some morphine.
Andrew is not happy to see Alice, because she has dirt on him that he would rather keep quiet. Melissa died in a fall down the stairs and everyone thought Andrew did it. Yeah, Andrew quit his job in London because he was a suspected wife beater. For real. So while Andrew is needling Alice about morphine, he’s also hoping she will keep her mouth shut about Melissa.
Andrew also needs a nanny for his daughter Emmy, and the cottage that Alice rents is on his newly-purchased property. He wants her out, and she volunteers to watch Emmy if he will let her stay, because she really needs a place to board her horse, who Emmy loves dearly, even though she just met him. So Alice becomes the nanny, and eventually the girlfriend. Then someone starts stealing drugs again and Alice gets the side-eye from the head of the department.
Andrew doesn’t tell Alice that everyone at the London hospital knows she was innocent of stealing the drugs, even when she asked him if he still thought she did it. Remember the part about him asking her to fetch some morphine? Yeah. Turns out Melissa was stealing the drugs and other things to feed her habit. Andrew didn’t want anyone to know, so he kept it quiet until Melissa fell down the stairs.
After they argue about how Andrew lied, the horse kicks him in the head, Alice realizes she doesn’t care that her life had been ruined because of a lying junkie and her husband, they live happily ever after, and I throw the book down in disgust.
Okay, I will give it a grade: D